Step 10: Treat Thyself

Dear Fat Jesse,

Today is big. It's our tenth step in the right direction together. It's been exactly two months since we started this weight loss gig. And I am exactly twenty pounds lighter. I feel like we should treat ourselves for all our hard work. The only problem? I don't know how to treat myself to something that doesn't end up on my waistline. This is a dimension to emotional eating that is rarely talked about, so I'm going to talk about it. We hear about eating your feelings or stress eating...even eating out of boredom. But some of us have a nasty habit of making food a reward in everyday life. This is actually a huge part of American culture if you think about it. We give our kids jelly beans to go potty, tell them they can have dessert if they finish their dinner plate, and make them their favorite meal for their birthday. For those kids who have great genes, or are more on the active side into their adult years, this doesn't become an issue. But some kids who grow up like this become adults like me. I blame this...

Oh, the irony!

Call it a cure or call it a side effect, but now that I no longer give in to my addictions to terribly unhealthy foods, I have no idea how to indulge myself in something that I enjoy. My go-to for my entire life has been something salty/crunchy/sweet to make life a little more special. Finals week in college was usually chock-full of trips to the local pizza place as a reward. Every major holiday in my family has a food that is synonymous with the celebration. If being a food addict wasn't enough to make treating myself difficult, there's another wrench in the works.

I'm a mom.

Let me tell you something, Fat Jesse. When you have children at any age, your 'me time' is almost non-existent. But when you have two in diapers and one is still nursing, you don't even have time to spell the word 'me'. My idea of a treat these days is taking a shower without my daughter pressing her face against the space under the door and screaming bloody murder for me, despite the fact that her dad is right there (the same dad she wants to call twenty times a day when he isn't here). In fact, these letters I write to you can only be accomplished over the course of days, and with the help of a very annoying Mexican pre-schooler who shouts repetitive instructions from a map. Yes, with the help of a Boppy pillow for the baby's meal time and a couple episodes of Dora the Explorer, I can have a little time to get in touch with my inner fat chick. Not much else though, F.J.

Where are her parents?! Probably blogging.

So I've decided to create my own Treat Alphabet. It will will be my new go-to for things that I can do to de-stress, celebrate, and unwind in this crazy world. I'm going to retrain my brain to see fun in everyday experiences--things that are always available and cost practically nothing.  As you may notice, I have included some food in the list, Fat Jesse. That's because I believe that, although food is primarily fuel, putting the right food in my body can be seen as a reward. So many times, the diet roller coaster makes us view healthy food as a restriction when it should be a relief!

New Jesse's Treat Alphabet

ANTM marathon with the best friend. Buy some new workout clothes. Call mom. Dark, dark chocolate. Express delivery upgrade. Funny Face starring Audrey Hepburn. Get my kids giggling. Hot chamomile tea. Internet search 90's TV shows. Joke with the hubby. Karaoke time. Lose the remote. Make up a dance routine with the toddler.  Not care about the messy house. Open the jewelry box. Print family pics. Quiet time. Redbox night. Starbucks ice water. Test drive a new lipstick. Unfold the double stroller and go exploring. Vote for Pedro. Wear a dress and heels. X-train DVD. Yonanas. Zzzzzz's.


Happy Anniversary,
New Jesse, -20 lbs